A Happy New Year
Wishing you all love, joy, peace, love,
freedom, prosperity, and much more.
and that you at least do not repeat last year’s mistakes..
A Happy New Year
Wishing you all love, joy, peace, love,
freedom, prosperity, and much more.
and that you at least do not repeat last year’s mistakes..
Siblings, Most adults too often do fight for a number of reasons.
-They fight because they want a parent’s or other person’s attention, especially where the parent has only so much time, attention and patience to give.
-They fight because they are selfish, jealous: “He got a new bike. I didn’t. They must love him more than they love me.”
-They even fight over ordinary teasing which is a way of testing the effects of behavior and words on another person: “He called me…” “But she called me…first.”
-They fight because they are growing up in a competitive, aggressive, self centered, worldly, dog eat dog, society that falsely teaches them that to get it, to win is to be better than to be the loser. “I saw it first.” “I beat you to the water.”
Lessons about jealousy, competition, sharing and kindness are difficult to learn, and, indeed, even many adults still still haven’t learned them. Too many adolescent may not recognize, admit still their needs or may be too embarrassed to express them verbally, so their ongoing fighting with siblings, others is a way to get their need personal attention which often next actually increase in adolescence life.
A Parent’s Checklist
As a parent, do you:
-Set aside some time to be alone with each child?
-Recognize that each child is different?
-Make sure your adolescents realize they are each unique and have a special set of strengths?
-Praise adolescents for being who they are and not just for what they can do?
-Avoid initiating competition among children?
-Realize adolescents and younger children need to be given the right also to decide not to share at least some of the time?
-Be sure older children are not usually forced to give in to younger ones because “he’s little” or “she doesn’t know better?”
-Talk positively to the adolescents about their fighting?
-Falsely encourage, promote the sibling fighting?
Good Music therapy can relax your body, improve your mood, and change the pace of your day.
When you recognize these unacceptable future increased violence warning signs in someone else, Hoping that someone else will deal with the situation is still false way out.
Be safe. Don’t spend time alone with people who show any of these warning signs and remove the person from the situation that’s setting them off.
The most important thing to remember is don’t go it alone. Expose the matter to others as well.
a history of violent or aggressive, abnormal . offensive behavior
serious drug or alcohol use
gang membership or strong desire to be in a gang
access to or fascination with weapons, especially guns
threatening others regularly
trouble controlling feelings like anger
withdrawal from friends and normal, usual activities
visibly feeling rejected or alone
having been a victim of bullying, or now being a bully themselves
poor school or job performance
history of discipline problems or frequent run-ins with authority
feeling constantly disrespected
failing to acknowledge the feelings rights of others
The angered people tend to jump to-and act on-conclusions, and some of those conclusions can be very inaccurate. The first thing to do if you’re in a heated discussion is slow down and think through your responses. Don’t say the first thing that comes into your head, but slow down and think carefully about what you want to say. At the same time, listen carefully to what the other person is saying and take your time before answering. Listen, too, to what is underlying cause of your anger. It’s natural to get defensive when you’re criticized, but don’t fight back. Instead, listen to what’s underlying the words: the message that this person might feel neglected and unloved. It may take a lot of patient questioning on your part, and it may require some breathing space, but don’t let your anger-or a partner’s-let a discussion spin out of control. Keeping your cool can keep the situation from becoming a disastrous one.
It’s best to find out what it is that triggers your anger, and then to develop strategies to deal with and to keep those triggers from tipping you over the edge.
Remind yourself that merely getting angry is not going to fix anything, that it won’t make you feel better (and may actually make you feel worse). You need to focus on the problem and deal with it effectively;
Logic defeats anger, because anger, even when it’s justified, can quickly become irrational. So use cold hard logic, Such as ” you’re just experiencing some of the rough spots of daily life. Normal people tend expect : fairness, appreciation, agreement, willingness, congenital agreements. The first best attitude to bring to such a problem situation, then, is not to focus on solely now finding the solution, but rather firstly on how you handle and face the problem.
We face a choice to deal with their angry feelings such as expressing our anger, suppressing our outrage, and submissiveness, calming Ourselves, controlling our outward behavior, but also controlling our internal responses, taking steps to lower our heart rate, calm yourself down, and letting the emotional feelings subside.
Assertiveness is expressing our anger in love ,without hurting others. Being assertive here doesn’t mean being pushy or demanding; it means being respectful of yourself and others.
Anger turned inward may cause next hypertension, high blood pressure, a self pity complex, or depression.
” Unexpressed specific anger can create other problems. It can lead to pathological expressions of anger, such as passive-aggressive behavior (getting back at people indirectly, without telling them why, rather than confronting them head-on) or a personality that seems perpetually cynical and hostile. People who are constantly putting others down, criticizing everything, and making cynical comments haven’t learned how to constructively express their anger. Not surprisingly, they aren’t likely to have many successful relationships. ”
a “knot” or “butterflies” in your stomach
changes in your breathing
flushed in the face
You can reduce the rush of adrenaline that’s responsible for your heart beating faster, your voice sounding louder, and your fists clenching if you:
Take a few slow, deep breaths and concentrate on your breathing.
Imagine yourself at a better place, the beach, by a lake, or anywhere that makes you feel calm and peaceful.
Try other thoughts or actions that have helped you relax in the past.
“I don’t need to prove myself.”
“I’m not going to let him/her get to me.”
Sibling rivalry, war is the jealousy, competition and fighting between the unloving and/or unloved brothers and sisters firstly. It is a concern for almost all parents of two or more kids. Problems often start right after the birth of the second child. Sibling rivalry usually continues throughout childhood and even adulthood, it can be very embarrassing, frustrating and stressful to parents. There some things parents can do to help their young kids get along better and work through conflicts in positive ways and help you keep the peace at your house.
Sibling rivalry, war is as old as the children of Adam and Eve and is too often recorded now as a sin in the Bible as well that has negative consequences on the persons involved and even others.
The real sad part is that many adults play also this false game still too.. Conquer and destroy!
Sibling rivalry can also be caused by proximity in age. Research suggests that siblings that are within two years’ age of one another tend to have more sibling rivalry than other siblings. Ultimately, sibling rivalry is often caused not only by by blocked goals but by poor personal communication skills, bad or extreme values, just like almost any other sorts of adult conflicts and wars
There are many factors that contribute to sibling rivalry:
-Past and present neglect of the siblings by the parents will top it all.. there are overarching sorts of factors and events that can be, ultimately, the root causes of any sibling rivalry. Knowing what these important factors and events are can help you to not only understand the causes of sibling rivalry, but to deal with sibling rivalry more effectively when it does occur. Some of the most common causes of sibling rivalry tends to be jealousy or selfishness.
-Each child, person is mostly competing to define who they are as an individual. As they discover who they are, they try to find their own talents, activities, and interests. They want to show that they are separate from their siblings.
-Rejected Children, Adults too feel they are getting unequal amounts of your attention, discipline, and responsiveness.
-Children often may feel their relationship with their parents is threatened by the arrival of a new baby.
-A children’s and an Adult’s developmental stages affect how well they can share your attention and get along with one another.
-Children and adults who are hungry, bored or tired, nervous, stressed out are more likely to start fights.
– Too many Children, adults too do not know positive ways to get attention from their brother or sister, so they pick fights.
– Family dynamics play a serious role here as well when one of the parent neglect one of their children, or shows a false favoring, partiality,. We are reminded this happened in the biblical account of Joseph and his brothers due to his new coat of many colors,
– Children, adults will fight more with each other in families where there is no set bounders, understanding that their fighting is not an acceptable way to resolve conflicts.
– All Families that don’t share enjoyable times together will probably have more family conflict next exasperated by a jealous immoral, insecure, poor self esteem spouse(s) of the siblings now too
– Unresolved Stress, poor health in the parent’s lives will often decrease the amount of still need attention parents give the children and thus increase the sibling rivalry.
– Stress in the children’s lives will next shorten their fuses, and create more conflict, cause significant home, community and even health problems as well
So how the good and bad parents do now still treat their kids, children and how they do now react to conflict will make a big difference in how well siblings get along.
The degree of existence of sibling rivalry, young offenders, gangs tends to show how good of a parent, manager, administrator now you really were, are.
No one will lie to God next in heaven
not even alcoholics, drunkards, liars, pastors,
perverts, adulterers , sex maniacs, lesbians, gays..
(2 Pet 3:3 KJV) Knowing this first, that there shall come in the last days
scoffers, walking after their own lusts,
(2 Tim 3:1 KJV) This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come.
2 For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,
3 Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good,
4 Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;
5 Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.
6 For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts,
7 Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.
8 Now as Jannes and Jambres withstood Moses, so do these also resist the truth: men of corrupt minds, reprobate concerning the faith.
9 But they shall proceed no further: for their folly shall be manifest unto all men, as theirs also was.
(Heb 1:2 KJV) Hath in these last days spoken unto us by his Son,
whom he hath appointed heir of all things, by whom also he made the worlds;
(James 5:3 KJV) Your gold and silver is cankered; and the rust of them shall be
a witness against you, and shall eat your flesh as it were fire.
Ye have heaped treasure together for the last days.
Leviticus 18:22, 24
22 You shall not lie with a male as one lies
with a female; it is an abomination.
24 Do not defile yourselves by any of these things;
for by all these the nations which I am casting out before you have become
18 For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against
all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men who suppress the truth in
19 because that which is known about God is evident within them; for God made
it evident to them.
20 For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes, His eternal
power and divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood through what
has been made, so that they are without excuse.
21 For even though they knew God, they did not honor Him as God or
give thanks, but they became futile in their speculations, and their
foolish heart was darkened
22 Professing to be wise, they became fools,
23 and exchanged the glory of the incorruptible God for an image in
the form of corruptible man and of birds and four-footed animals and
24 Therefore God gave them over in the lusts of their hearts to
impurity, so that their bodies would be dishonored among them.
25 For they exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and
worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator,
who is blessed forever. Amen.
26 For this reason God gave them over to degrading passions; for their women
exchanged the natural function for that which is unnatural,
27 and in the same way also the men abandoned the
natural function of the woman and burned in their desire toward one
another, men with men committing indecent acts and receiving in their own
persons the due penalty of their error.
28 And just as they did not see fit to acknowledge God any longer, God gave
them over to a depraved mind, to do those things which are not proper,
29 being filled with all unrighteousness, wickedness, greed,
evil; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit,
malice; they are gossips,
30 slanderers, haters of God, insolent, arrogant,
boastful, inventors of evil, disobedient to parents,
31 without understanding, untrustworthy, unloving,
32 and although they know the ordinance of God,
that those who practice such things are worthy of death,
they not only do the same, but also give hearty
approval to those who practice them.
1 Corinthians 6:8-10
8 On the contrary, you yourselves wrong and defraud. You do this even to
9 Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not
inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators,
nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor
10 nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor
revilers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God.
1 Thessalonians 4:2-8
2 For you know what commandments we gave you by the authority of the Lord
3 For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you
abstain from sexual immorality;
4 that each of you know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and
5 not in lustful passion, like the Gentiles who do not know God;
6 and that no man transgress and defraud his brother
in the matter because the Lord is the avenger in all these things, just
as we also told you before and solemnly warned you.
7 For God has not called us for the purpose of impurity, but in
8 So, he who rejects this is not rejecting man but the
God who gives His Holy Spirit to you.
12 The night is almost gone, and the day is near Therefore let us lay aside
the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light.
13 Let us behave properly as in the day, not in carousing and
drunkenness, not in sexual promiscuity and sensuality, not in
strife and jealousy.
14 But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no
provision for the flesh in regard to its lusts.
5 For this you know with certainty, that no
immoral or impure person or covetous man, who is an
idolater, has an inheritance in the kingdom of Christ
6 Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these
things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of
7 Therefore do not be partakers with them;
8 for you were formerly darkness, but now you are Light in the Lord; walk
as children of Light.
34 Be on guard, so that your hearts will not be weighted down
with dissipation and drunkenness and the worries of life,
and that day will not come on you suddenly like a trap;
16 But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not carry out
the desire of the flesh.
4 for it is a minister of God to you for good. But if you do what is evil,
be afraid; for it does not bear the sword for
nothing; for it is a minister of God, an avenger who
brings wrath on the one who practices evil
(Isa 9:6 KJV) For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace. 7 Of the increase of his government and peace there shall be no end, upon the throne of David, and upon his kingdom, to order it, and to establish it with judgment and with justice from henceforth even for ever.