Daily Archives: July 17, 2008

The false divorce incentives

(Luke 14:31 KJV)  Or what king, going to make war against another king, sitteth not down first, and consulteth whether he be able with ten thousand to meet him that cometh against him with twenty thousand? 32  Or else, while the other is yet a great way off, he sendeth an ambassage, and desireth conditions of peace.
 
 (James 4:5 KJV)  Do ye think that the scripture saith in vain, The spirit that dwelleth in us lusteth to envy?
 If you still do have a God shaped vacuum that is unfilled, then no other things, no relationships or careers, goals, next will satisfy you, not any personal, social, community relationships..
 
Note this reality.. like it or not.. believe it or not..
 
Both fornicators and adulterers are excluded from Heaven. They are pursuing vanities as far as God is concerned..
 
“Have you not known that the unrighteous the reign of God shall not inherit? Be not led astray; neither whoremongers, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, the reign of God shall inherit. And certain of you were these! But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were declared righteous, in the name of the Lord Jesus, and in the Spirit of our God” (1 Cor 6:9).
 
 Some of the reasons that relationships and even marriages fail are unrealistic expectations, greed, lies,  laziness and a spouse has false personal values, false assumptions, -the myth of the greener grass, and also the inablity to handle the sheer pace, stress of  of life. And for sure sexual infidelity will tend to kill a marriage, be an immediate grounds for a divorce too.
 

The Marriages that slide downward go through these stages: romance, reality, resentment, unforgiveness – bitterness  and rebellion – divorce.

still excludes the common realty also that bad friends, bad relatives, others do work hard to break up the marriages too….

Key steps that help to break this cycle and to change marriages are for a start…

First, open your life fully to God. (Luke 6:27). Without God in control of your life these days it is likely your marriage ALSO  next will fail

-Second, follow God’s ways continually. (Ephesians 5:1)

– Honor each other: be faithful and committed, recognize the dignity and special worth of all others, admire, affirm and celebrate each other, and avoid continual fault-finding.

Our personal beliefs and feelings toward people tend to follow what we believe about them. A judgment is MY interpretation of someone’s life at a point in time, it still doesn’t give the whole picture and becomes a label by which I narrowly view and interpret that person. What are some reasons some people too often “put-down” or judge  others rather than affirm, accept them with Christ’s unconditional love? They firstly do not have the real love themselves. They likely come from troubled, divorced homes or are in a troubled marriage, home.

“A love that cherishes is patient and kind (1 Cor. 13:4). To be patient means “to take a long time to boil” and is the opposite of rudeness and irritability. Patience celebrates  our strengths and validates our uniqueness. Kindness involves being gentle, sensitive, considerate, thoughtful and helpful to make life easier for the other person. 

Love delights…

Such love enjoys giving attention to the other, spending time together. (Eccl. 9:9) Such love enjoys expressing affection to the other, including sexual intimacy for those who are married.(1 Corinthians 7:2-5). Such love enjoys growing spiritually with the other, together opening our lives to God  and praying, together getting to know Him better and together following His ways.

(2 Peter 3:18).

“How incredible it would be if in all of our relationships–with God, with our husbands and wives, with our families and with our friends–we could experience great delight!” (Schorr Line, May 29, 2009) Centre Street Church is affiliated with the Evangelical Missionary Church of Canada  http://www.cschurch.ca/

 

Let us not be desirous of vain glory, provoking one another, envying one another.  (1 Cor 13:4 KJV)  Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,  5   Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;

(1 Cor 13:2 KJV)  And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. 3  And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.

 

Contrary to the devil’s and lawyers lies, only the lawyer’s and the courts are those persons who tend to get richer, profit generally from a divorce. On top of that Divorce persons tend to have a shorter life span, and more health problems as well compared to the others.

 

A spouse also tends not to file for divorce unless certain conditions are met..
– The think they can get richer by a divorce.. but 2 can live cheaper than one..
– They have a substitute mate in mind, whom they should have consulted first, cause often they have no intention ever of marrying them too..
– The have the false support of their family, mother generally, brother and sister. Even often a false pastor, a false church now too.
– They have adequate cash at hand to pay for the initially lawyer’s fees. you would be surprised how many spouses still keep a hidden bank account from the other spouse, eventually the other spouse finds out and this causes really deep bitterness, anger, resentment, even unforgiveness too.
There’s no doubt there are abusive spouses, male and females.. but often one spouses provokes the other one into an abusive response knowingly  beforehand as well..
Still there are no real spousal winners in broken home, a broken marriage generally now still too.
Both men and women often still are no angels.
Can a true professing Christian now file for divorce? and why do so many Christians still do get divorced? see also http://thenonconformer.wordpress.com/2009/01/02/divorce-and-remarriage-in-the-christian-church/
For the last 5 years the above post has been one of my most popular on the net too

 

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Can a true professing Christian now file for divorce? and why do so many Christians still do get divorced?
 There is clearly only one legitimate grounds for divorce for all believers, it is when  one an unrepentant spouse had committed adultery and refuses to repent… yes then divorce is mandatory here.. if they repent it is not! 
 
But  as far as unbelievers, we do not have to judge them they have been already judged by God and are going to Hell unless they repent (Rom 2:16 KJV)  In the day when God shall judge the secrets of men by Jesus Christ according to my gospel.
 
(1 Cor 5:12 KJV)  For what have I to do to judge them also that are without? do not ye judge them that are within? (1 Cor 5:13 KJV)  But them that are without God judgeth. Therefore put away from among yourselves that wicked person.
(1 Cor 6:1 KJV)  Dare any of you, having a matter against another, go to law before the unjust, and not before the saints? 2  Do ye not know that the saints shall judge the world? and if the world shall be judged by you, are ye unworthy to judge the smallest matters? 3  Know ye not that we shall judge angels? how much more things that pertain to this life? 4  If then ye have judgments of things pertaining to this life, set them to judge who are least esteemed in the church. 5  I speak to your shame. Is it so, that there is not a wise man among you? no, not one that shall be able to judge between his brethren? 6  But brother goeth to law with brother, and that before the unbelievers. 7  Now therefore there is utterly a fault among you, because ye go to law one with another. Why do ye not rather take wrong? why do ye not rather suffer yourselves to be defrauded? 8  Nay, ye do wrong, and defraud, and that your brethren. 9  Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, 10  Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God. 11  And such were some of you: but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God. 12  All things are lawful unto me, but all things are not expedient: all things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any.

Yes, murder, divorce, adultery, stealing, drunkeness too and lying are all wrong;  All are a sin. John tells us, “Whoever commits sin also commits lawlessness, and sin is lawlessness” (I John 3:4). Sin is the breaking of God’s commands, so, yes, breaking any command of God is sinful. Sin is seprating  oneself from God, into an initial hell and eventually into an eternal hell even by one’s own free will choice as well.  Sins can be repeatedly committed to the point that a person becomes numb to the guilt of violating God’s law. (Prov 21:29 KJV)  A wicked man hardeneth his face: but as for the upright, he directeth his way. (Prov 28:14 KJV)  Happy is the man that feareth alway: but he that hardeneth his heart shall fall into mischief. (Prov 29:1 KJV)  He, that being often reproved hardeneth his neck, shall suddenly be destroyed, and that without remedy. (Rom 9:18 KJV)  Therefore hath he mercy on whom he will have mercy, and whom he will he hardeneth.
   “Now the Spirit expressly says that in latter times some will depart from the faith, giving heed to deceiving spirits and doctrines of demons, speaking lies in hypocrisy, having their own conscience seared with a hot iron” (I Timothy 4:1-2). A word used for this state is “licentiousness,” which has been briefly defined as being deluded to think that you have a license to sin. A related word, “lasciviousness” is defined as the state where a person doesn’t care what God or man thinks of his actions. Generally these words are applied to sexual sins, but any sin can develop into licentiousness. “For certain persons have crept in unnoticed, those who were long beforehand marked out for this condemnation, ungodly persons who turn the grace of our God into licentiousness and deny our only Master and Lord, Jesus Christ” (Jude 4).
For true Christian believers a mutually agreed temporary marital separation is also permissible but not a divorce.. why not a divorce.. cause they will do the same wrong things definitely in their next marriage too.
(1 Cor 7:10 KJV)  And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband:11   But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.
(1 Cor 7:12 KJV)  But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away.
(1 Cor 7:13 KJV)  And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. 14  For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.
(1 Cor 7:15 KJV)  But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.
The Bible says that Adultery is God’s trap, punishment for those whom he is upset at.. and the same Bible says that God does still punishes people even for their sins even if they have been forgiven as a deterrent for them not to sin anymore.
 
 

 Do see also

  
 

The too common abusive silent treatment

Is the continual silent treatment, the clear attempt at ignoring you, even  for days or weeks a sign of a mental abuse?
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 Absolutely yes! but not always.. We all have an equal  right to speak and to be heard now as well. We tend talk to those people we love, and reject, ignore, divorce  those people we hate. No question about it. This type of response is a common and immoral act by selfish, spoiled, self centered persons.  Anything that they now next  can do to upset you, to get you guessing about why too, or to make you think that you have done something  wrong, have   them is their basic approach, motive.       
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Which reminds me of the false silent treatment I next get from the rather mostly, too often bad crooked pastors after i rightfuly do ask them to repent and cause I refuse to do all they tell me that I should do..yes the continual silent treatment, the clear attempt at ignoring you, even for days or weeks is still a sign of their bullying, mental abuse of others. Such big sinners they still are.. http://postedat.wordpress.com/2012/03/05/spirtual-abuse-by-the-so-called-christian-leaders/
The WRONGFULLY STILL Unrepentant bully’s problem is that he or she is one of those bad persons who only feels truly alive when voicing hostility and contempt for his “enemies.” Without that, he or she starts gasping for air. It’s his nature.. self-destructive” .. clearly these immoral Bully, Basher of others, Abusers of others has a disappointed, deflated ego, negative self worth, most likely related to past unresolved guilt, as a result of that the bully, he or she, tries falsely to build their ego up by bashing, hating others, by being an antagonists against his proclaimed enemies, which too often also is most people , for he or she no longer trust anyone, and Abusers this is a common very typical approach, fact in the character build up of Bullies, Bashers, but their approach is futile, the subsequent feeling of self worth dissipates too quickly, are actually replaced by guilt, and his ego, self worth likely needs to be recharged with new hate.. and is replaced with more and larger hatred of the others. I have seen this type of wrong behavior not just in bad managers, bad politicians, bad cops, bad persons, but in alcoholics, and most often in  rednecks , religious fundamentals, evangelicals who promote hatred over love and now as well as the crooked pastor wrongfully fighting for control over others.  Not surprisingly many prideful people try to take the place of God in my life too, AND these imposters claim even that they have been chosen, designated by God to command over me, THAT I am required into forced submission to their whims, desires , commands. But funny God now himself has not revealed those facts as well to me BUT only to them.
I put my trust in God and not in man.. All friendship, relationship, submission not just in marriages in real life now too is reciprocal, and unenforced.  We submit ourselves solely to God, to Jesus and the Holy Spirit.. who guides us, leads us into all truth. Jesus Christ is still the head of the Church, Churches! God’s chosen leaders still cannot force any one into submission, for all submission is even mutual, voluntarily, willingly, uneforceable and all leaders are to be exemplary now firstly too and not rather HERE mere commanders or dictators . And don’t try to tell me God has called you to be a leader.. show it, act like it first.. I would rightfully see a sermon practised over one merely preached to me and so would God.  I know that this forced submission emphasis, demands are a false attempts by these overly perverse, ambitious, crooked persons, bad pastors and bad religious persons now included too, for these persons and mere persons who do want now by such means to attempt to self prosper, to grow richer, to advance themselves over others still have have no good concerns for me. They are slave drivers. Slavery was abolished a long time ago too.
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Let me be very clear about that Jesus has set me free, now I am a slave to no man but to Jesus Christ himself, alone. I serve no man, especially any of the clearly foolish, perverted ones, and I take orders from no man, I do not have to do what they desire or try to command me to do at any time too. No matter if they still do wrongfully think otherwise too. I am still only God’s slave and not any man’s.
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Is 2:22 Cease to trust in [weak, frail, and dying] man, whose breath is in his nostrils [for so short a time]; in what sense can he be counted as having intrinsic worth?
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The silent treatment  it can be damaging to the individual’s emotional health where the victim  report a sense of not belonging, loss of control, lower self-esteem and a feeling of unworthiness.  People with a low self esteem, ostracized females tend to work very hard to win back the good graces of others but most males still do not.  
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The silent treatment is another  definite, abusive, calculated  form of power control over others and also a pre calculated  mind game that the abuser falsely plays on their victims . Spouses, Teachers, Neighbors, Pastors, bosses also wrongfully play this game. And the victim could be anyone, a spouse, boyfriend or a mother, neighbor. They do want an overly  submissive reaction from you, to bring you under their false bondage,  to firstly still only make themselves feel more powerful and better than you. Now basically isn’t that what they are looking for that big word POWER, Control, Domination. All friendship, relationship, submission too is reciprocal, and unenforced.
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By openly ignoring you they try to falsely say that you are not important to them or any others or that to them you do not exist!! They falsely devalue you as a person and make you feel less as a person or at least  do try to  so  The abuser IS TRYING TO TO DEGRADE YOU TO FALSELY MAKE HIMSELF / HERSELF  FEEL BETTER AND  is NOW ONLY PUSHING THEMSELVES RATHER. THEY ARE THE LOSERS NOW. Your recognition of the problem is 90 percent of the solution here too.
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Persons who use this approach tend to escalate next to other forms of abuses also to get their way.  If confronted about this, they are exposed, they next often  tend to deny and deny their course of action, aim, to  lie. There here is basically nothing wrong with you, and remember that, you never really do not deserve this kind of treatment from anyone. It IS mental abuse! These bad people do need to find a better way for  their anger management. 
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The adequate response next is to Tell them openly that you are aware they are upset at you, what they are doing you will give them next  5 minutes to talk about it and to get it out out of their system, and then you do not want to hear or see it again. You will go on with your life. Anyway this absue  only works only if you allow them to abuse you. Go on now, next  with your life even without them if you have too.
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 (Psa 79:5 KJV)  How long, LORD? wilt thou be angry for ever? shall thy jealousy burn like fire?
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(Psa 80:4 KJV)  O LORD God of hosts, how long wilt thou be angry against the prayer of thy people?
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(Psa 85:5 KJV)  Wilt thou be angry with us for ever? wilt thou draw out thine anger to all generations?
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(Jer 9:5 KJV)  And they will deceive every one his neighbour, and will not speak the truth: they have taught their tongue to speak lies, and weary themselves to commit iniquity. 6   Thine habitation is in the midst of deceit; through deceit they refuse to know me, saith the LORD.
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(Jer 9:8 KJV)  Their tongue is as an arrow shot out; it speaketh deceit: one speaketh peaceably to his neighbour with his mouth, but in heart he layeth his wait.
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(Jer 9:9 KJV)  Shall I not visit them for these things? saith the LORD: shall not my soul be avenged on such a nation as this?
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(Eccl 7:9 KJV)  Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools.
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(Jonah 4:4 KJV)  Then said the LORD, Doest thou well to be angry?
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(Eph 4:26 KJV)  Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath:
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(Mal 2:16 KJV)  For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away: for one covereth violence with his garment, saith the LORD of hosts: therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously.
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(Eph 4:25 KJV)  Wherefore putting away lying, speak every man truth with his neighbour: for we are members one of another.
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(1 John 2:11 KJV)  But he that hateth his brother is in darkness, and walketh in darkness, and knoweth not whither he goeth, because that darkness hath blinded his eyes.      
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(1 John 3:15 KJV)  Whosoever hateth his brother is a murderer: and ye know that no murderer hath eternal life abiding in him.
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Now about some of my reasons for my use of a valid   silent treatment..

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LET ME BE CLEAR TO ALL  I REALLY  AM NOT INTERESTED TO READ OR TO DISCUSS ANYONE’S  OWN IMMORALITY, PERSONAL OPINIONS, UNSUBSTANTIATED FACTS, MERE DISTORTIONS, LIES, SLANDERS.

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Further more those whom I love I talk to and I also chasten and rebuke. But if you want to lie to me,  about me, slander me, abuse me, I am much happier not to talk with you ever  again as per my right… and I will until you repent. simple as that now too
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(1 Cor 5:1 KJV)  It is reported commonly that there is fornication among you, and such fornication as is not so much as named among the Gentiles, that one should have his father’s wife. (1 Cor 5:2 KJV)  And ye are puffed up, and have not rather mourned, that he that hath done this deed might be taken away from among you. (1 Cor 5:3 KJV)  For I verily, as absent in body, but present in spirit, have judged already, as though I were present, concerning him that hath so done this deed, (1 Cor 5:4 KJV)  In the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, when ye are gathered together, and my spirit, with the power of our Lord Jesus Christ, (1 Cor 5:5 KJV)  To deliver such an one unto Satan for the destruction of the flesh, that the spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus. (1 Cor 5:6 KJV)  Your glorying is not good. Know ye not that a little leaven leaveneth the whole lump? (1 Cor 5:7 KJV)  Purge out therefore the old leaven, that ye may be a new lump, as ye are unleavened. For even Christ our passover is sacrificed for us: (1 Cor 5:8 KJV)  Therefore let us keep the feast, not with old leaven, neither with the leaven of malice and wickedness; but with the unleavened bread of sincerity and truth. (1 Cor 5:9 KJV)  I wrote unto you in an epistle not to company with fornicators:(1 Cor 5:10 KJV)  Yet not altogether with the fornicators of this world, or with the covetous, or extortioners, or with idolaters; for then must ye needs go out of the world. (1 Cor 5:11 KJV)  But now I have written unto you not to keep company, if any man that is called a brother be a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolater, or a railer, or a drunkard, or an extortioner; with such an one no not to eat. (1 Cor 5:12 KJV)  For what have I to do to judge them also that are without? do not ye judge them that are within?
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The Bible is clear what we are to do with a person who professes to be a Christian brother but is a drunkard, an unrepentant sinner. Have nothing to do with them.
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